Showing posts with label My Writings. Show all posts
Showing posts with label My Writings. Show all posts

Tuesday, January 10, 2017

Release Day Blitz: Resignation Letter

Resignation Letter by T. A. Moorman
"Sometimes non-fiction is even more tragic than make-believe."

Resignation Letter
T. A. Moorman
Published January 10, 2017 
Pronoun

Synopsis:

The first in a serial series of non-fiction short stories of a life that has seen too much heartbreak.

Loving someone isn't easy. Accepting the one you love may not love you back is even more difficult. Step into a world where more nightmares live than dreams.

Sometimes, real life has even more drama than the most popular of Soap Operas.

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About The Author:
When you become a Mom, you begin to put yourself last, and your combat boots begin to collect dust. Going to your child's PTA meetings in full Gothic, especially industrial, regalia is pretty much frowned upon. Especially by your own children, and your teens would die of a heart attack. But, one should not have to completely stop being themselves, uniqueness is greatness. So all of that darkness is put into words in her books, her first title Witch Wars, and designs in her jewelry sold in her Etsy shop, GothicMomsDarkCharms.

A mother of five beautiful children, but by far more than just that. T. A. Moorman is an artist, a violinist, a seamstress, a crafter, a writer, a blogger, a reviewer, a dark confidant and a darkly dangerous, fiercely protective friend.



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Friday, July 29, 2016

A Witch in Need



I've been through a lot of things in my lifetime. Enough to know for a fact that I must have been one evil twisted witch/bitch in a past life for Karma to be riding my back as hard as she does.   But what I'm going through right now may very well be the final straw that breaks this camels back. There are some days, more often than not, that I hope to not even wake up at all. One thing I've learned through all of this is to never look a homeless person on the street the same way again.

Many of you may know or not that my family and I are now homeless. We are some of the fortunate ones at the moment because most nights we have enough money to afford a hotel/motel. Some nights we aren't so lucky and my mate and the youngest of the clan end up sleeping in the parking lot of the hospital I work at while I'm on the inside at work. (Yes, I work midnights, in a lab, working with blood, I most definitely appreciate the irony.). And no, we don't have a lot of money, I just know how to search the web and find the best and cheapest deals for our area. Anything to keep us off of the streets. Some nights my family will graciously (yes, I am being sarcastic) keep the eleven and three year old. The seventeen and fourteen year old they will keep for all nights as they have successfully, along with the catholic school I paid for them to go to, brainwashed them into thinking that I am evil incarnate, and think they hate me to the point that they cannot stand to be in the same room as me. That is a story for another day. But, my most of my family does hate me, and walking into that house without any guards up I am hit with not only all of that hatred at once, but the utter confusion coming from my children, not knowing how they really should feel about me, the animosity my family carries for one another. Its like walking into a fog so thick that I can't even breathe. And being forced to go there more often than not due to the situation is a true punishment. What's worst? They're willing to let me come back, if I'm willing to stop going to work. Become a welfare Mom living off of the system. For one, not that easy, for two, that's just not me. I have nothing against those that do, more power to you, just too many hurdles for me to deal with and not even enough in the end game to be worth my while.

Being homeless is something I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy, and yes, I have more than a few. Not knowing where the people I love will lay their heads from one day to the next is the worst punishment Karma could ever throw onto me.
                                                                  
The worst part is all of the opinions being thrust onto me from all sides. Until you can bare to walk even more than a block in my shoes... My partner made some terrible mistakes which lead up to this, for which I picture myself murdering him and again for doing so. But, what some may not know about me is that I'm also an empath (yes, a witch, or a sensitive, or whatever category you want to put it in). No, I can't go running around moving things with my mind, but I feel what others are feeling, some more strongly than others. So when a person is doing something due to shear maliciousness, I know it, when they do something because they truly believe its the best thing to do, no matter how wrong or stupid it may be, I know that too. Trust me, that's not always a good thing. Because that also means when a person hates me, truly, I feel it coming at me in waves so strong it would give Point Break a run for its' money. And when a person truly does love me and my children, I feel that just as strongly. But, I also feel the frustration, the friction, the unease, the anger, every bitter emotion that comes with not being able to do for the ones you love. Compound that with my own feelings it makes it a struggle day by day to just go on.
To say this has been a true journey would be a drastic understatement, I just wish that we come to the end of the road of it very soon. People have so many different opinions and suggestions that I do appreciate and have been trying to follow these leads. My luck just sucks and what has worked for some isn't quite that simple for me. Most places that may have helped us want to see an eviction notice, which is something we never received. Some want to see everyones birth certificate, which I don't have the money to replace everyone's right now, and with the haste of the move, most are missing. They want proof we've been living out of the car, and though a lot of our things are inside of the car, that isn't proof enough.
And trying to find a place? Somehow agencies and housing companies have pretty bought up the entire market where we stay, there are very few private landlords left. And they have so many stipulations and requirements you would think you were buying the house. It would probably be easier to get a loan, which is also next to impossible. And everytime it looks as though we are about to break free of this nightmare something else claws its way to the surface and drags us right back down. For instance, the car will be shut off due to non payment tomorrow because I had to take the money I had already borrowed for that to pay for the car to be fixed since the tire decided to pop off while I was driving on the highway. With the kids inside. Even though I continue to try to explain to them that I am trying to work extra days to rectify everything and to pay them, they aren't hearing it. But, how will I get to work without a vehicle? And here is another important question, where will we even be when they decide to disable the vehicle? They have already told me whenever it goes idol, it will be disabled on either Friday or Saturday morning, wherever we are, even if that may be a gas station. What kind of world are we living in where that is allowed, especially for only one payment, not several, not even two.

They say you aren't given any more than what you can handle, but I would really love a reprieve right about now. I finally had everything planned all out. I was going back to school online, going to finish out my book series, work more on my art, finally become someone my kids can look to with their heads held high and say that's MY Mom. And I still plan on doing all of that, but it's next to impossible without a stable roof over our heads.
Truly need some relief.
                                                               

Sunday, May 8, 2016

Happy Mother's Day

Picture from http://www.lovethispic.com/tag/mother's+day+gif


Do me a favor? If its' still early enough wherever you are, do something nice for a Mom. Even if its not yours. The hardest job in life, and the least rewarding, is being a mother. Once you bring a child into this world you realize that none of them come with an instruction manual. The only thing each of us can do is whatever we feel is right for our child(ren), and most of us usually get a lot of it wrong. But, each and every Mother deserves an A for effort on this day.
So, if you can, just offer a smile, a few kind words, a flower, a small trinket, or even a card or a balloon. Not every Mom has someone to make this day special for her for whatever reason. And trust me, even the evil Moms that try and pretend that they don't care, they truly do want to.

Tuesday, April 26, 2016

Ignorance



This transgender bathroom issue is getting more and more ridiculous by the day. It seems the only thing that this great 'free' country is good for is spreading hatred in one form or another. I would like everyone who has their head up their ass in regards to this to take it out for just a moment and think about this: this didn't just start today, this month, or even this year. If a person was born as a male or female and is no longer identifying with that sex and become the opposite? Guess what, they've been going to whatever bathroom that coincides with the gender they live as day by day. Know something else? You never even knew it, and still won't. So this hate bandwagon is not only unnecessary but just plain and simple, fucking stupid. 

Please stop saying that the problem is the worry of your 'children being molested', because that is the last thing this group is thinking about. And if you are truly worried about your child being molested, perverts come in all shapes, sizes, gender and race. If a transgender male goes into a female restroom, she will be going into a stall and you would never know. Same with a transgender female, he won't be standing at the urinal, he will be in a stall minding his own damn business, why don't you try doing the same. 

The LGBT community is always being razed and ostracized for one reason or another. After this people will be saying that lesbians and gay males need to have their own bathrooms as well. 

When its' all fun, games and/or entertainment, everyone is just fine with it. When it comes to watching a man dress as a woman in a comical scenario there is no complaining then. And no man that I know complains about seeing two women kissing or doing much more than just that. But when it comes to real life...

Dear America, start worrying about the million and five REAL issues this country has. Enough with the bullshit.

Tuesday, October 6, 2015

Reproductive Rights and Justice (Sample 1): Tubal Ligations

Sample #1

Bitch Media, I just love saying their name, is getting ready to offer fellowships for writers. Catch? You have to have three writing samples of the topic of your choosing out of the four options provided:
  • Reproductive rights & justice
  • Pop-culture criticism
  • Technology
  • Global feminism 
The top one being the closest to my heart as a mother of almost half a dozen children. Thought you all would like to ride along this journey with me as I attempt to be published for some actual mula , and not just for free. Feel free to leave your opinions, especially if you notice any typos. I have until all Hallow's Eve to get this done. So, send me all the light, love and luck you can!

Picture from http://www.obsessionistas.co.uk/collections/2011/7/6/hand-pushed-vehicles-0038.html

Reproductive Rights and Justice: Tubal Ligations

Something I have wondered for as long as I've been old enough to know what all of the birds and bees subject was all about was, why on earth does a woman need her husbands signature in order to be able to have her tubes tied? For any and all women in the United States of America who are single, once they reach a certain age, plus the particular doctor's criteria, is able to have their tubes tied, clipped and burnt without anyone's permission other than her own. Yet, when it comes to a woman who has said those two all important words, 'I Do', they have to have a permission slip signed by the man they have promised to honor and obey. 

Now, correct me if I'm wrong, cause I am not one of those people who suspect that they are right at all times, but, does a man whether married or not need to have permission to have a vasectomy? If that is indeed the case, which I'm about 99.9% sure that I am, why is it not the same for the woman? Why do women have to constantly jump through different hoops in all things in life, especially when it comes to their own body? This is a complete and utter injustice no matter what way you look at it or debate about it. For there to be any equality or justice in this area it should either go both ways or be a demolished practice altogether; either both need the others' permission or neither. 

Don't get me wrong, this is most definitely a subject that should be decided among the couple regardless of which party would like to have him/herself fixed. It should not be a law where the woman has to 'ask daddy', and have it in writing, whether or not he will allow her to have such a procedure done to her body. It is the equivalent of saying that once married the wife's body is now the property of the husband's, but his still belongs to him to do with as he pleases. In a world where it is now accepted for the husband to be a stay-at-home dad, it should not be right for that working mom, especially one who may be struggling as it is, to have this decision as anything but strictly her own.   

Friday, August 28, 2015

Handle With Care

Words by me, picture found on http://www.loverofsadness.net/show_picture.php?tag=tears&sort=rated&page=3


Handle With Care...

When dealing with someone who is used to practically living in a shell and/or behind a mask, when they let you in, try not to forget what a truly fragile thing that is. How honored you should feel by being allowed to see how that person truly feels, knowing that only a very tiny portion of the world has ever known their true feelings. True, they may have shown their anger and rage to the world, and even may wear it as a badge of honor. When it comes to their innermost feelings, hurt, sadness, fear? Those feelings they are so used to locking away feeling that if they do say something, no one really gives a damn anyway. Laughing louder than anyone else rather than drown in their own tears.

They've already been dumped on, abused, misused, even set aside as non-important. They already know how the world will view their feelings; thinking that in some way, shape or form whatever has happened to them is in some way their own fault. Something they should have done or said differently. Someone they shouldn't have been around in the first place or had the nerve to trust. That something they're afraid of is so tiny and insignificant they should never have been afraid in the first place. Forced to wrap their feelings in a tight bubble inside of their heart that they only let burst in private, though all the while some of those feelings leak out so they just smile while enduring their private pain.

So when they put that trust in you to be that one person they believe within their heart and soul they are able to turn to, their rock, solid ground when they feel as though they are sinking, handle that title with tender care. Try not to forget how hard it is for them to trust in the first place.



Monday, July 13, 2015

Undying Inferno


Image found on Pinterest via Google

Undying Inferno by T. A. Moorman

Someone asked me recently what is that a woman really wants in a relationship? Here's my response...

Every woman wants to feel irresistible, irreplaceable, wanted, needed, desired whether you've been together sixty days, months or years. Women want to know that spark that was ignited the very first night you lay together is still there. Women want to know that fierce, burning inferno of passion is a flame that will never die out. Women want you to let them know just how much you truly yearn for them. They want to feel your touch, your dark, sensual caress. They want to know that your body becomes aroused at the very thought of being allowed to lay down beside them. They want to know that feeling of longing they feel for you whenever you're apart is reciprocated. They want to feel, not only hear, just how beautiful they are to you both inside and out. Life may not be about sex, but when you're with someone, knowing that you are the object of their darkest fantasies? Knowing that they drive a passion within you that is so strong you simply need to be inside them? That is something that goes way beyond being priceless. No money in the world can ever purchase a gift as great as that.

Thursday, June 25, 2015

A Mother's Burden

A Mother's Burden

Words by me, picture found on Google under "Gothic Babies"
A Mothers' Burden:

I don't think people realize how hard it is to NOT spoil a child after you've lost one. My son is only two years old, and is an extremely active, spoiled Momma's boy. Yes, I did it. Yes, I admit it. While I know that makes him extremely difficult to deal with at times, most of the time, I can't help it. I gave birth to him less than two years after giving birth and then losing my first son when he was no more than two weeks old.

So, yea, he does get away with a lot of things that he shouldn't, but he isn't all bad. He is still a sweetheart, albeit a devilish one.

I guess my point is this. Before you start judging someone and telling them what they should and shouldn't do when it comes to their kid, stop and think about what their reason might be behind their actions. Losing a child is the most soul wrenching experience any parent can go through, especially losing them to death. So those lucky enough to have a second chance, to be graced with that soul once again? Well, to say they are frightened, excited, happy and terrified doesn't even begin to describe the multitude of emotions they experience. And there is no time limit on how long they may feel that way.

Those that are talking their shit, but are there through the thick, thin and craziness too, giving that support (even from long distance) and just telling it like it is, this doesn't apply to you. Cuz trust me, we need all the help and LOVING support we can get. Just don't forget that sometimes with this sensitive area, we need to be handled with child-size-black-lace-gloves. And even though it may not seem like it, we do appreciate your help and advice, most of the time. Lol.

Those that talk shit and are just around or touch bases only every now and then, or even once every few months? Can it. Unless you're a Cobbler and can literally walk a mile in my shoes, I'm really sick and tired of hearing what you have to say.

Saturday, May 30, 2015

Chapter 2: The Succubus, The Witch and The Vampire

This work by no means should be duplicated, reused, reprinted or reposted in any way, shape or form. This is an unprotected proof. Opinions are welcome, piracy is not. 18& older only should this content.


Chapter 2

Meanwhile, that chaos was beginning to rein in the orphanage of Underlayes.

Blowing the doors off the hinges of what appeared to be a simple cottage, not caring that by doing so removed all form of glamour hiding it for what it truly was. An enormous Gothic Cathedral, built to house all sorts of beings and keep them hidden and protected, turrets reaching the darkened moonlit skies. Sentry Gargoyles that were once perched upon the rooftop crunched beneath the Queens booted feet, she hissed as she realized she was walking among the remains of long-time friends. Friends of who have now given their very lives protecting that which she tried her damndest to keep hidden from the world. Just the thought of the excruciating pain they must have endured being crushed while in their stone form sent chills up her spine. No more would they sail the skies, nor would they protect what lay behind these hollowed walls as vigilantly as only a Gargoyle could. What truly made her cringe was imaging what creature could have welded such power to do so, and the fact that the being now had Jelissa in their clutches. Just as the Queen began to enter, flaming with rage, quite literally, flames swirling around her irises she heard faint hiss off to her side. Turning and crouching slightly, Queen Tialanna let out a hiss of her own ready to attack at the slightest provocation. Focusing more closely on the rumble she caught a slight movement. 

“My…Queen”, the faint whisper came from the direction of the debris, “…please. Tia.”

As badly as she wanted to have hoped that hearing that voice meant there was at least one survivor amongst the carnage, she knew better. There was far too much rumble littering the ground for a whole body to be intact. And while this dimension may have many beings with the ability to regenerate a limb, a Gargoyle was not among that list. Stiffening her spine, Queen Tialanna begrudgingly made her way towards a voice she knew all too well. 

“Dear Goddess, why?” She seethed between her fangs. Walking slowly at first, Tia picked up her speed with the last few steps, knowing she could not avoid the inevitable. “Ebrahim, how could this have happened?” She asked more to herself than anyone else as she knelt down beside the Gargoyle whom had once stood sentry on her own childhood home.

“End. Me. Please..” He from lips that were part stone, part flesh. Peering more closely, Tialanna was coming to realize to her sheer horror that all of the Gargoyles had been destroyed mid shift. Severed arms and legs interspersed with wings and talons of stone, some still writhing in agony while most had mercifully moved on. In broken words he begged, “I cannot…shift. Too much pain. Nor…can I heal. Nor…move on.”

Knowing what was being asked of her, yet dreading it all the same, Tia knew this was not something she be able to do alone. “ELYSSIA!” She bellowed out to her sister, a sister whom she prayed to the Goddess could shed some as to what had happened, and how.


Flashing, molecules unforming then reforming at her sister’s side, trying and failing desperately to contain her very own rage, she could feel her ebony skin frosting over by the second. Princess Elyssia had been hiding who and what she was for the past twenty years, an elemental witch from the House of Sekhmet. Baby sister to the Queen, as well as Leader of the Royal Guard, her true elements being wind and water, though while her sister’s fire flamed when she became enraged, Elyssia frosted over with ice. Her dark ebony skin casting a pale blue luminescent tint, eyes turned to glaciers with swirling diamond flecks. Her smooth and gentle waters turned to an ice that she could wield as a weapon deadlier than any blade.  

Sent here to build this very orphanage so that she could aid the Queen in hiding their family’s biggest secret, and their greatest treasure. Doing away with her “seers” robes, she flashed into her war gear; black and metallic silver leather jumpsuit with an insignia of her sisters crest, a circles of flames, steel toed knee high combat boots with throwing stars strapped to the sides, arm sheathes carrying her athames and a belt hanging diagonally along her hip holding her leather barbed whip. Whipping her long blue hair into a high ponytail before kneeling beside her sister, she heard gasps coming from inside the orphanage and knew the other “seers” would soon be joining them. The time for hiding was far from over. A slight tug came to her lips as she pictured the alarmed and surprised looks of the caretakers and children when they saw her two cohorts as the vampires they truly were. The vampires were family members from Tia’s other side. Guess Elyssia and  Tia should have taken heed from dear old Mom that secrets can never remain hidden.

Despite the dire situation they were facing, and the gruesome scene before her, she couldn’t help but chuckle to herself at the thought of her Father turning over in his grave now that she was cavorting with the 'blood sucking cretins'.

“What would you have of me, Your Highness?” Knowing how much it irked Tia for her to address her as such, she couldn’t help the jab. Even though trying to lighten the mood was a futile, and more than a little immature attempt.

“Cut the bullshit Elyssa! They have her! What the fuck are we going to do?” Fire gleaming in the banks of her eyes, Tialanna did her best to rein in at least some of her anger as flames licked up her arms. “Ebrehim protected us for most of our lives, and how do we repay him? By allowing his family and friends to be slaughtered, a truly royal way to show gratitude. If whoever took her is capable of this type of destruction, what could they be doing to her right now? This is all my fault! She doesn’t even know who she is, nor any idea why she’s been taken. As far as stupid plans go, this one was epic.”

“What else could you have done? Seriously, Tia? Not a damned thing. She wouldn’t have stood a chance at surviving even this long had we not secreted her away. We’ll find her Tia.”

“Oh, yeah? Why don’t you enlighten me on exactly how we’re going to do that?”

“Where’s Grimm?” At the mere mention of her former mentor and one of her husbands, Tia turned away from her sister, unable to make eye contact. “Tia, please don’t tell me you still haven’t-”

“No, I haven’t! When Darvyn and I got him back it was a fragile thing, if we told him then it would have broken him. An alpha werewolf, who had not only been captured and tortured, but also couldn’t even protect his mate? We kept waiting for the right moment. Dear Goddess, how am I going to tell him now?”

“Twenty fucking years, Tia? You have GOT to be kidding me!”


Anya watched on as her two sisters faught back and forth with one another from the broken doorway of the orphanage. With her platinum blonde hair hanging just shy of her waistline, extremely pail skin and the fangs she had been born with that never completely retracted, it was no wonder their mother had kept Tialanna, and not her. Anya and Tialanna are twins, if it wasn't ovious enough from the description they're fraternal. Not only do their appearances differ, but so to do their powers. Both hybrids born from the descreet union between the original Queen of the Witches and King of the Vampires. One raised by the Queen since she could be passed along as no more than a witch, the other by the King due to the undeniable vampire traits in which she possessed. While Tialanna knew nothing of her twins' existence, Anya had known all along. Her pscychic powers never allowed for much to be hidden from her. Along with being able to call on the wind, another of her abilities was also that of tremendous instinct for when she should, and should not act upon what has been shown to her. Knowing always that even though you may know the outcome of something to be tragic, sometimes you must step back and let things run its course. Otherwise, the outcome could become catistrophical. Which lead to a very lonely life, that is until someone came along that saw her resistance of being close to anyone as a challenge. Kierra has stood by Anya side throughout every storm life has leashed upon them thus far, and has never once bristled at any of the decisions Anya has been forced to make, or to ignore.

Kierra could be described as a beautiful Amazon warrior; with her sleek muscles that by no means overtake her femininity, long, thick, corse black hair that she keeps in cornrows that she can easily pull back in battle, dark, unmarred ebony skin and lush deep red lips that beg to be kissed. Her weapon of choice is that of a battle axe, though no-one can figure out where she keeps it hidden when wearing her Royal Guard uniform that doesn't leave much to the imagination. Only her beautiful wife, Anya, and Tialanna know that it waits in the ether until she has need for it. A secret they keep from everyone as it would reveal what she truly is, its' one thing to flash clothes onto your body, something only the witches, and vampires' if they are powerful enough, have the power to do, but a weapon forged in the fires of Hel's domain? Not likely. Hidden among the vampires since birth, Kierra is truly a demon with an angel for a father. Its no wonder she and Anya are perfectly mated for one another; one with a gift that could possibly make even the kindest of souls hate them, the other with an ability anyone would kill for, able to turn her feelings on and off at will. So even if Anya is forced to let even an Apocalypse take place, Kierra could quite naturally sit back with her love in her lap and enjoy the show. There are only two types that a demon cannot turn off their feelings for; their true soul mate and their children. Even with them their feelings can be muted at times.

Anya began feeling her loins heating up, a sure sign her wife was near and had sex on the brain. A sure distraction that she truly didn't need right now, even though to say she wanted it would the Goddess' honest truth. Not bothering to say a word and not heed to the open door, Kierra pulled Anya back tightly against her front slipping her hands beneath the folds of her robes knowing she wore nothing underneath, making her fight desperately to hold in a gasp as she slowly guided one hand to cup her breast and with the other slipping two fingers into her tight, wet folds.

“Hungry”, Kierra rapse in her deep, gravelly voice just as she pierced Anya's neck with her fangs, both upper and lower, thrusting her long, callused fingers ever deeper into her wet heat.

Knowing on a soul deep level that her wife became ravenous for both blood and sex in times of stress, two things that helped to shut her feelings off, Anya let Kierra take her fill. Moving her body to the rythym her wife set, she thrust images of each and every way she planned to devour her once the situation was at least marginally under control.

Just as Kierra was licking her wounds closed, Anya had a vision of exactly where her niece was being held captive. And that it was not the time to find her, yet. 

Disentangling herself from Kierra and flashing out of her robe and into her own uniform of the Royal Guard, she took in the scene playing outside once again. Watching as among the rumble her brother, Bastien, and Tia's husband, Darvyn, flashed into existence before turning to her wife, “Let's go.”

Her mental to-do list growing by the millisecond; stop her sisters' from killing each other, help release  the Gargoyles from their torment, and keep the fact she knew where Jelissa was secret until the time came to help her niece.

Side by side they stepped into what just may be the beginnings of a brand new war.

Friday, November 21, 2014

Dedication Page

Words by me, picture provided by Google.
Dedication Page

Sitting here alone in the dark I find myself contemplating on all of the decisions I have made in me lifetime. While some were all wrong or right for all of the wrong reasons. Some leaving me hurt and bleeding from the inside out. I still cannot bring myself to regret not a one of those choices. Even though with a different one I may be richer, more successful and maybe even happier, I have to ask myself would it be worth it if changing even the smallest thing meant losing anything/anyone I hold dear and near to my heart and soul. Regret is a word I will forever stricken from my vocabulary for it holds no place in the woman that I am nor the even more glorious one that I plan to become. I will hold within me all of the pain, the hurt, the sorrows, the madness and the rage, but along with it I will also embrace the love, the joy, the passion and most importantly the knowledge.

Many people whom have lived even a fraction of all the obstacles I have overcome and still must endure have not even lived to tell their tail or have succumbed to that darkened place within their hearts, minds and souls and retreated to a place of no return. There are plenty of times I have wanted to let go and just tell life 'NO MORE!', I have not, I will not, I shall not. I embrace the darkness within me along with the light, even though it is a constant struggle I will never give up this fight. I will continue to laugh in the faces of people who want no more than to see me suffer and watch me break down and descend into a downfall i which I can never climb my way out of, I vow to never give them that satisfaction. One day not too far in the future my name WILL be in print and my dedication will read:

TOO ALL YOU BITCHES WHO FOOLISHLY THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME, THANK YOU FOR ALL YOUR HATRED, IT WAS ALL THE MOTIVATION I EVER NEEDED.

Sunday, October 12, 2014

Breaking Point

Breaking Point

Sekhmet, my Goddess, my strength, my inner warrior within, I need you now more than ever before. A killing rage boils within my blood and I fear for the fate of the world if I allow it to be unleashed. These pitiful humans in this world think I cry of sadness but they r tears filled with anger and a hate so cold it would chill the world of ur sisters, Hel, and for the first time in eternity she would be able to feel pinpricks of ice upon her brow.

Never again will I allow anyone to walk over me and take my kindness as weakness. Never again will I bend over backwards for ppl who would do no more than spit on my face if they saw me engulfed in flames.

I pray to you to hold my madness within. For the next time, I will unleash this power and relish in the fact that what happens as an end result will make even the Horned God cringe.

Saturday, October 11, 2014

Dark Love

Dark Love

How far would you b willing to go for love? If you met someone online, who you knew in your heart and soul was the one for you. Someone you knew could fulfill your darkest desires, please you and keep you satisfied. Someone who knew exactly what u need. Would you travel across oceans to be with that person. Or would you be willing to live your life with what if?

I'm a dominant woman who needs an Alpha male. As with all aspects about me, there is no true category. I need a man who is man enough to handle me. Not a push over too afraid to even approach me because I'm too "intimidating". So far, the only men who have come close are in other continents.

But one, dear Goddess, he is more than just close. He is my other half. In exquisite dark detail, he has described everything I need, my every want, and not just in the bedroom. I feel my heart longing for him, my soul gravitating towards him. My body aches with need of him, my heart yearns to be with him. When I lay my head down to sleep I can feel his arms wrapped around me in a strong embrace, feel my face resting upon his chest. I can envision our children fighting, laughing, playing and loving one another. I can almost feel him pushing so deeply inside of me that I don't know where either of us begins or ends. Can feel the sweat of our bodies mingle as we take each other to an ecstasy that knows no bounds.

But, what if? What if I'm wrong? What if our fantasy is too good to b a true reality? What if I'm fooling myself in thinking he's as real as I need him to b? What if this is nothing more than a dream that I need to believe in this life of a nightmare that I am living now? What if, as with everyone who is supposed to love me, my blood kin, when we finally meet he feels that I am not worth his love, that I don't need it? What if this is all just an elaborate game to him and he just wants to see how far it will go?

But, what if I'm right? What if this is real and I find myself too afraid to make that leap of faith? What if I do take that chance and find him waiting for me with open arms, longing for me, needing me as I need him? What if with him, my home of my heart awaits?

Shall I take that leep? Or shall I spend my life wondering, what if? Would you?

The answer is yes. The only real love is one your willing to fight for, sacrifice for. My Dark Knight awaits. And have mercy on any soul that stands in our way.

Monday, September 23, 2013

The Succbus, The Witch and The Vampire

This short story is not to be duplicated, reprinted, published, sold in any type of way or format without the express permission of the author, Tiffany Moorman.

Please do not read any further if you are under the age of 18 or are sensitive to any sexual behaviors.  Oh, and enjoy!  Trying to make up for being late on my reviews.






            I awoke with a start, gasping for air.  Considering the situation, I’m surprised I didn’t come to and start screaming my head off like a banshee.  Oh, I also woke up not knowing where the hell I was, or how I got there.  Some birthday this was turning out to be. 

            See, I went to bed just like any other normal twenty year old.  Turning twenty-one, being able to drink, legally anyway, FINALLY saved up enough money to move out on my own.  I even went to bed early because me and my girls were supposed to be celebrating all day and all night!  Including getting rid of my virginity!  Growing up with a house full of orphaned witches, vampires and were’s does not make a dating life easy, believe me.

            Well, one thing is for certain, I no longer have to worry about losing my virginity. OH STUFF IT!  U STUFF IT! Ur the one who got us into this mess! Well, arguing with u isn’t gonna help us remember jack!  Great, now I’m having a mental battle with myself, that’ll really help me figure out wtf happened.

            First thing I should probably do is take in my surroundings, eh? One thing is for sure, I don’t have to even think about my little virgin issues.  Ha! Seeing as though I am stark-bootie butt-naked besides some damn collar on my neck, in a huge bed with three just as naked men with collars on their necks!  Thankfully they're blissfully sleeping still.  Thank Goddess for small favors.  Hopefully I can figure this out before they wake-up.  And from the smell of things, I’d better act fast.  Though they all have their faces turned away from me I can smell shifter, vampire and holy shit!!! A damn demon?!
            Hookay, Jelissa, lets pull it together.  The only thing I'm missing as of right now is any memory of last night, well that and my damn clothes.  Time to answer the question I've been dreading, do I still have any powers?  Screwed up as they may be, anything is better than nothing at this point. 

See, I’m a witch, well actually I’m more than that, but that’s all the orphanage seer’s could see clearly when I was brought to them as an infant.  That, and the fact that I was pretty much a mutt.   They ended up having me sniffed out to try and figure out what I was.  All that concluded was I have four different bloodlines within me.  Talk about multiracial.  The orphanage wasn’t, and still isn’t, an uncommon place for something like that. It’s pretty much what makes up the whole place, unwanted cross-breeds, misfits, or true orphans whose parents’ have passed on. Well, okay, there’s usually only two things kids are cross-bred with, not four, and the seer’s had no problem figuring out what that is.  Guess I’m special.  So I became a great guessing game, and they’ve just bided their time waiting to see what powers, if any, I developed.  So far I have the ability to call insects, which came in quite handy in school and some telekinesis (I say some cause if I get too upset I just blow up whatever it is I’m trying to move). Which may come in handy now.  If I focus on the lock on the door, whether it unlocks or simply blows up who the Hell cares as long as it opens. So I focus, and focus some more, and the only result I get is a little dizziness, feeling myself going cross-eyed and nauseated. 

“Damnit,” I mutter.

Maybe I can do a past visualization.  If I can’t get out, maybe I can at the very least figure out how I got here.  And pray to Goddess that nothing else happens while I’m in a trance.

As above so below, I begin chanting, show me the events I need to know.  Letting go of all and any other thoughts, as above, so below, show me the events I need to know. Taking in deep breaths, letting my physical body go, as above so below, show me the events I need to know.  Letting my spirit slide into the black, stillness of the astral, asabovesobelowshowmetheeventsIneedtoknow, as above, so below, as above, so below……….

“Aw shit,” I gasp, realizing I’ve overdone it, like I do so many things.  Because instead of just seeing what happened last night, I’ve ended up in the back of my own mind and will not only watch the events that took place, but get to relive them, without being able to stop a damn thing.


Well, at least I didn’t go back too far.  I was back in my bedroom, just finishing putting on the black leather and lace corset Genie, my best-friend/wizard/werewolf, had gotten me for my big day.  I was determined to figure out how to work the damn garter belt.  I mean, really, who invented this crap.  Oh yeah, a sorceress who could just flash her clothes on with no prob, not thinking about poor lil misfits who have had terrible incidents with trying to do so.  Yeah, so not going there.

But, anyway, I was looking pretty damn good.  The corset was perfect,  hiding my love handles just so, shaped my big ass boobs quite nicely with just enough cleavage showing through and the leather of the boy shorts was the soft kind, and felt oh so good.  I even had my odd colored hair cascading down my back.  No, I am not exaggerating, its long and wavy, and dark brown with a little blonde, red and black highlights.  Like an anime style hair-do gone all wrong.

Sitting on the side of my bed preparing for the dastardly task of working with the forsaken garter belt, something on the end table next to my bed caught my eye.  A tall, skinny, frosty glass with something that looked like smoke coming from the top, and a note underneath.

Hey Lee,

Just a little something to calm your hectic nerves and start the night off right. A wolfmist spritzer.  Don’t worry, its only just enough liquor in it, won’t knock you on your ass too hard. LOL. Just enough so you can relax through that twelve o’clock mark and not worry so much about what the rest of your bloodlines might have you turning into! LMAO. We love you girl, and want you on your WORST behavior tomorrow!

Night Love,
Deela

“Sweetness,” I said to myself.

I gingerly took a small sip, cause you never know what you might end up with when it comes to D.  Good intentions and all that, she may be mixing liquor and potions all at the same time, and might have given me the wrong glass.  You get the picture.  But after a few delicate sips, it was going down nice and smooth, with just enough bite to it, so I decided to down the rest.  Big mistake.

I didn’t even realize how I was even feeling anything until I tried standing up, and plopped right back down on the bed.  All of a sudden I got a major head rush and felt as though my legs couldn’t even hold me up.  I remember thinking that’s weird, I may be just now turning twenty-one, but this sure as hell wasn’t my first drink.  I chalked it up to drinking too fast.  I ran a hand over my face and tried to shake it off.  That so did not work.  At that point I just wanted get some water or something, anything, because something was so not right.  Second attempt at getting up though, even worse than the first, I went to stand and landed on my knees.  Bracing my hands on the floor, I tried to pull myself up, thenended up on my hands and knees barely holding my head up.It felt like a boulder on top of my shoulders.  I would have fallen down completely on my face had I not been grabbed from behind, non-too gently, by a pair of rough, strong hands.

The stranger picked me up, then sat down on my bed with me in his lap.  My eyes were rolling to the back of my head, I fought desperately to keep them open.

“Who….the fuck…..are you?”, I rasped.

“Never you mind that,” answered a deep, gruff voice, “who I am is unimportant.”

“The….wards,” it was such a struggle to speak, to stay conscious.  Every room in here had wards.  No one was allowed in anyone else’s room without permission, except for the head-mistresses of course. “How?”

“Those shabby sigils placed around here?  Don’t make me laugh.” He began touching me then, and I was helpless to stop him, then and now. “Let’s see what merchandise the master has me picking up now, shall we?”

“Don’t…..please…..don’t touch…me,” my words just fell upon deaf ears.  I tried to open my eyes wider,  hopingto see what this man looked like, but it was pointless.  He wore a cloak, and there was no way could I try to pull it back.  Holding me up by one arm, he took his other hand and roughly grabbed onto my breast through the corset.   Then let his hand slide down my abdomen, then lower.  I started breathing heavier, never have I felt so violated.

“Mmm….very nice equipment you have here, but that’s just the outside.” Taking his thumb to push my underwear aside, he jammed one finger inside of me, hard.  I wanted to scream but I couldn’t find my voice.  He took it out, a second later I heard him popping hisfinger out of his mouth, “Tastes, lovely.”  Then he tried to jam two fingers in, hard, fast and deep.  It hurt! “Oh my my, surely this is a jest, untried waters.  And for what has been prepared for you?”  He began laughing then, a sick laughter, though it was fading like I was falling down a tunnel.  Everything began to fade away.

NO! Don’t blackout! I shouted to myself, frantic, knowing how futile it was, GET UP!! I can only see what you can see, and we need to figure this out!!

Then blackness.


When I came to again, I was being carried by the stranger, I couldn’t get a smell on what he was exactly, my mind was still too foggy.  I feel hot, from the inside out, like I was coming down with a fever, but sickness isn’t what I feel.  I just feellike I needed something, but what?

As he carried me down a long darkened stone hallway, my terror grows, but my fear was nothing compared to the unbearable heat I was feeling. 

The farther down the hall we went, the louder the sounds of fighting grew.  I could hear jaws snapping, snarling, the sounds of flesh pounding on flesh.  We were going towards it, not away.  The sounds were becoming so loud they were almost deafening.

And the heat! It was so stifling I could barely breathe.  And my body, my breasts began feeling so tight it was almost painful.  The ache didn’t stop there, it travelled even lower along with a liquefied heat down past my abdomen, all the way down to my very core, it felt as though my clit was literally throbbing, pulsating.  I was tempted to ask my captor if he felt it too.  Though I knew he couldn’t have, he was walking with not a break in his stride, carrying me as if I were no more than a ragdoll.  I peered up at my captor, trying once again in vein to get a glimpse of him but I couldn’t see past that damn cloak.  It kept his face hidden in shadows. 

We finally came to a stop, and from the sounds of it we were about to enter right where all of the fighting sounds were coming from. 

Setting me on my feet, with his arm still around my waste, my captor leaned down putting his nose in the crook of my neck inhaling deeply, “Mmm….smells like everything is kicking in quite nicely.  Seems as though all of your bloodlines are ready to merge together and come out and play.  I think you and your…..roomies will get along just fine.

“Can you stand on your own?”, he asked, while easing his arm from around my waist, slowly stepping away from me.  Surprisingly, I was able to stand on my own, though my brain felt like a jumbled mess. “Very good then, off you go.”  With that, he pushed open the massive, mahogany door we were standing in front of and shoved me inside, closing the door firmly behind me.

The room was enormous, stone walls painted black with drips here and there running down looking like blood.  The only illumination came from the few sconces hanging off the walls. Though that didn’t seem to matter, somehow I was seeing everything with crystal clarity.  I mean sure, I have good eyesight, but this was something totally different, I could make out every shape, every shadow, every crease on the satin sheets that covered the huge bed in the center of the room. 

But that’s not what I was focusing on right now, it was the source of all of the noise which suddenly stopped as soon as I entered.  In the corner of the room a werewolf in wolf form, in all his silver glory stopped in midswipe scenting the air, jerked his head in my direction inhaling deeply took a step back from his combatives.  He threw his head back and howled, and I heard an answering howl in the back of my mind.  Sparks in the air indicating he was about to change form. 

An incredibly beautiful male, no, vampire, who was on the receiving end of the would-be swipe, pivoted in my direction.Gorgeous white hair with silver streaks flowing down his bare back, deadly yet sexy fangs protruding from his mouth, eyes bleeding red.  Tilting his head almost cat like to the side, he looked directly into my eyes and hissed and took huge jump back.  While staring at him in wonder and awe, I felt my gums begin to ache.

Looking down on the floor beside the vampire, I saw a demon with his gazed transfixed on me.  And not just any demon, an incubus, hazel, bedroom eyes on cream a colored face, chiseled to utter perfection.  I knew he was of the incubi because something of me knew, recognized it, and answering to him as well.  He jumped from his back to his hands and knees, crawling towards me.

They all started towards me slowly, unsure with a look of curiosity and hunger in their eyes.  Even the wolf who had finished changing into a gleaming, sweaty, muscular hot chocolate male with no hair on his entire body from head to toe.  I felt myself beginning to walk towards them, drawn to all of them.

Once they reached me, there were no words, none were needed, not here not now.  It was like a well choreographed dance, each man knew exactly where to go, and none of them so much as flinched if they accidentally touched one or the other. 

The demon reached me first, he stood and took my lips in a devouring kiss, one meant to take ones soul away in glorious agony, only that is not what happened.  And I began to realized just what my captor meant, because the succubus in me came to the forefront to devour him as well.  Our souls had a sensual battle with each other, almost having us both climax right then, we broke the kiss on a shocked gasp. He then went behind me, working the lace of my corset.

The vampire was suddenly there, capturing my face in his hands staring into my eyes.  Fangs still protruding from his gums, I felt fangs of my own ripping through my gums.  I had no time to feel the pain though, as if he knew I was about to, he pressed his lips against mine, sliding in his tongue to glide it against my gums, coating them with his healing salve that I had only heard about.  He began kissing me in earnest, nibbling at one another with our fangs drawing just a taste and oh how sweet it is.  Going down to his knees, he began to work my underwear off my hips.

The werewolf, no gentleness with that one, grabbing a fistful of my hair he yanked my head to the side to sniff at my neck.  Whatever he smelled there he must have liked, he crushed his mouth to mine.  Kissing me hard and demanding, exploring my entire mouth with his tongue. Then his inner wolf melded with the wolf I never even knew I had. 

Somehow we all ended up on the bed, all of us naked, all of them kissing or licking some part of my body.  It felt glorious.  Being part succubus had every one of my holes hot, wet and ready and all of them were hard, stiff and waiting. 

On my knees kissing the vampire his hands kneading my breasts, pinching my nipples. The demon on his back, his tongue working wonders inside of me while his thumb played with my clit, he worked his tongue in, out and around kissing and sucking as though he had just discovered the finest wine.  The werewolf on his knees behind me, working his fingers into yet another hole, stretching me, preparing me.  I screamed an orgasm into the vampires mouth as the were began to nudge into me, the demon getting to his knees as the vampire began to push his shaft into my very core.  They both began thrusting into me, slowly at first and then faster, both going at a synchronized rhythm,  inducing both pleasure and exquisite pain inside of me.  The demon on his knees, I grabbed his ass bringing him closer to me, putting his entire long, thick shaft in my mouth until it was touching the back of my throat. 

Which is how I bonded with him first.  As he spent his seed inside of my mouth and it trickled down my throat, our souls went in and out of one another’s bodies, pledging to each other for all eternity.

I felt myself tighten and clench around the vampire and wolf as they grew larger inside of me, and I bonded with them too.  The vamp and I latched onto each necks with our fangs, marking each other, the wolf sank his own fangs into my shoulder, my wolf answering his with claws that sprang from my fingertips latching into his thigh.  And we all climaxed going over the edge together in bliss.


Coming back to the here and now, all I realize is that I am even more screwed than I thought.  I am now bonded with a wolf, a demon and a vampire and we don’t even know each other’s names!  Not only that, how are they going to feel about that when they awaken?  Were they drugged like I was?  Will they remember everything that happened?

I finally know everything that I am, and it’s a truly messed up combo, a witch, a vamp, a wolf and a succubus, but what good does it do me when I’m being held captive by who knows what, or why.  And a collar on me that’s blocks me from using any of those powers.

Dear Goddess I need HELP!!



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